Christine,
You are pretty durn awesome, just thought you should know that (if you didn't already). I think you did a nice job with this particular improvisation. I see how you play with mirroring parallel's from "Gloss", yet maintaining true to your own creative work. I like the idea of the narrator's close relationship with nature--naturalism in a sense, but at the same time not. I enjoy the concrete, the specifics. By carefully minded specifics as you did, such as: "At lunch he read Outdoor Life...", or "his acid-green Ranger / with a willow switch / on the dash and the dogeared / Bible in the glovebox", brings this draft to life, actually gives breath and movement to the piece. Also, I like the way you have taken very specific objects, giving the reader visuals throughout the entire discourse of the draft. I think you did a great job with this improv'!
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